


How to Entrap a Predator

by everythingshiny



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: AU, Bored Stiles, Crack, Detective Stiles, M/M, Stiles is a little bit of a stalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-21
Updated: 2013-08-21
Packaged: 2017-12-24 06:20:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/936422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everythingshiny/pseuds/everythingshiny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles is going to get to the bottom of the freaky supernatural cult in his neighborhood if it kills him.  And it just might.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to Entrap a Predator

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nightfog](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightfog/gifts).



> Pretty much OOC all around. Sorry. Written for a challenge at Beacon Hills @ LJ
> 
> thanks to alorarose & skieswideopen for fixing my atrocious writing.

_**Day One** Subject is cleaning their car. In the sunshine. With soapy water. The whole situation is ridiculously attractive and unfair. I'm pretty sure that Mrs Hirsch from down the street has been pruning that same tree for the last ten minutes. Subject's shirt has remained on for the duration of car cleaning. No, wait, Subject's shirt has been removed. God have mercy on my souiom;klm/////_

Stiles was sure that there were worse fates than his current one, having a broken leg in the middle of summer. Like being stuck in summer school with Harris while kangaroos invaded beacon hills. Look kangaroos are legitimately scary, alright? Falling off his chair and onto the floor while ogling his hot neighbour probably wasn't helping matters. He groaned as he tried to push himself up and failed. He might just lie here a minute, just in case he had a concussion or something. Luckily, hot neighbour didn't seem to have a job to go to, so he provided hours of entertainment. Well that was a lie, really. Minutes though. Definitely minutes. More than Mrs Hirsch anyway, who seemed to be overly attached to her cat and worked a lot.

"Stiles." 

"Yeah, Dad?" 

"What are you doing on the floor?" His father looked down at him from the doorway, his face somewhere in between amused and judging. Mostly judging.

"I fell off the chair. No need to help me up, though. I'm just checking out the ceiling. I was thinking, maybe I could get some of those little glow-in-the-dark stars and stick them on the ceiling one day." His leg didn't hurt; he'd mostly broken his very short fall with his upper body. All he was really suffering from was a slightly bruised ego. Soon the cast would come off and he’d have better things to do than hang around his bedroom all day.

"Okay. Well, don't break your other leg in your attempts to redecorate your room. I just came up to tell you that Scott called and is coming over, so expect him sometime soon. I’m going to work and won’t be home til late." His dad turned to walk away, back down the stairs. Evil stairs. Stiles tried to only go downstairs if there was a reason. Like eating. Yeah, eating was a good reason. If only his dad would let him have a beer fridge in his room. His life would be _so_ much easier!

"Thanks, Dad. Next time, bring food up the stairs!" Stiles shouted the last few words to make sure his father heard. That his dad hadn't brought food in the first place was a grievous offence that would be remembered. 

Stiles hauled himself back up to his perch by the window and discovered to his dismay that his hot neighbour had gone back inside while Stiles had been chilling on the floor, checking for killer dustmites, leaving his gleaming Camaro drying in the sun. 

~*~

_**Day Four** Have reason to believe that Subject is a vampire. Evidence so far, for the affirmative: pretty sure skin glows, ~~seems to have ~~~~~~definitely has thrall, frequently goes out at night, inhumanly hot, possibly has super strength. Evidence so far, for the negative: comes out during the day._

_~~Note to self: Never ever google "how to know if your neighbor is a vampire" ever.~~ _

Stiles wouldn’t call it stalking, exactly. After all, the only watching he could do was through his bedroom window. It wasn't his fault if his limited view happened to include the house belonging to Hot Neighbour. And it wasn't as if he was going over and staring through the guy's windows or anything. It was just a healthy curiosity about what was going on in the area. Like neighbourhood watch, only more focused. Besides, he could only spend so long on Netflix and PlayStation before his eyes started burning.

He wasn't even sure how long Hot Neighbour had been living in number 114. He’d never noticed the guy before his banishment to his bedroom like Rapunzel. Not that he’s waiting for a prince or anything. Technically he was supposed to have gotten a job this summer, but the broken leg put a damper on that plan.

Number 112 was home to Mrs Hirsch, who had lived there for around five years and never really said hello, and 116 was empty. Or possibly home to some sort of alien entity. Sometimes the windows glowed green.

Stiles was ninety percent sure that he'd seen Hot Neighbour carry a concrete mixer across the yard like it weighed nothing, though. But to be fair, Hot Neighbour had worked up a sweat while doing yard work and Stiles couldn’t be sure he was recording information right in his brain.

Currently it was all quiet on the western front, which was great because Scott and Allison were arriving in twenty minutes to take him to the movies and it would take him at least that long to lug his leg around and get organised. Scott still felt guilty for his broken leg so he’d definitely help Stiles down the Evil Stairs of Doom. Ensuring that the neighbours weren't supernatural entities was a hero’s job for another day.

~*~

_**Day Nine** Holy shit have received intel on subjects name. It's Derek. That doesn’t sound like a very vampire-like name. Will table vampire suspicions for now. Also shocking development in where he spends his Tuesdays and Thursdays. Unless he drinks animal blood...._

“Are you staring out the window again?” 

“Scott! You brought food. Have I told you lately that I love you, you’re a god amongst men, etcetera, etcetera.” Stiles reached out to grab the bag of chips that Scott offered as he came barrelling into the room. 

“You know it's creepy to stare at the neighbours. Mrs Hirsch would probably murder you in your sleep if she thought you were spying on her. Derek definitely would,” Scott is sweaty from his bike ride over, since it's a billion degrees outside.

“Hold up, have you been holding out on me, how do you even know his name?” 

“Who, Derek?” 

“No, the teller down at the minimart. Yes, Derek! Number 114?” 

“Oh, he volunteers at the shelter.”

Stiles felt his jaw drop. “He what?”

“Yeah, Deaton sometimes sends me over there to do stuff, and Derek like, walks the dogs or whatever. He’s pretty much a butthole, though. I didn’t realise he was your neighbour until, like, a week ago,” Scott had already taken a spot on his bed, since Stiles was sitting on his computer chair near the window. Totally innocent, though. Just near the window. Not like, hanging out of it or anything. 

“How can anyone who volunteers to look after puppies be a butthole, Scott? That doesn’t even make sense.”

“I dunno. He just is. Anyway, what did you want to do today? Do you wanna go out or have a movie marathon?” Scott reached into his backpack to pull out a bunch of Marvel movies and Stiles decided he could dwell on this new important information later. 

~*~

_**Day Eleven** Ok so we’re back on vampires again, or maybe… something else super strong. Like... a troll or something. There is no way that Derek is a troll, trolls are not that ridiculously good-looking. Unless that’s a myth that is perpetuated by the jealous. Maybe trolls are really attractive and are persecuted because of their name or something. Werewolves? There would have to be wolves or howling for that plus there is like, no hair on that body whatsoever. ~~The hulk?~~ Mutants? no. Demigod is a definite possibility, but there hasn’t been any lightning or rainbow bridges. _

_Vlad the Impaler wasn’t even a real vampire. That is such a let down._

There wasn’t really any noise, and if he hadn’t been looking out the window when it happened he would have missed it, but there was definitely a body that went flying through the upstairs window at Derek’s. The body crashed on the ground and just lay there, unmoving - not Derek, a woman, definitely a woman.

However while Stiles was fumbling around for his phone to call his dad, the body disappeared. There was no way it could have moved that fast unless it got up and walked away, and no one would be getting up fast after a fall out of the second story window. Unless it was moved. Moved superhumanly fast, too.

“Stiles, if you’re calling me to order food again, you know I’m at work and I’m not here to cater to your every whim. Just go down the stairs. It's not that bad.” 

“No, Dad, it's not that. I saw someone like, die. There was… death. Or maiming. Maybe just maiming.” 

“Son...” The sheriff starts and Stiles can hear his exasperation over the phone. 

“No, really. I happened to be looking out the window and saw a girl come flying out the upstairs window at number 114 across the street and now the body is just GONE. I think you should go have a look. Wait, maybe you shouldn’t go look. What if he eats you too?”

“Stiles, what are you even talking about? Actually, no, don’t answer that. But I’m heading out anyway, so I'll go take a look if it makes you feel better. If someone flew out a window, you should call an ambulance” 

“Yeah, well she’s not there anymore so I can’t just call the ambulance. But a woman fell out the window. There is definitely something weird going on over there.”

“I’m sure everything is fine. Number 114 you said?”

“Yeah -- oh and Dad?”

“Yes, Stiles?”

“If you’re coming here anyway, maybe you could pick me up some Chinese and bring it up the stairs? I mean, since you’re in the neighbourhood.”

Hanging up on people mid-conversation was just rude. 

~*~

_**Day Twelve** So maybe sending law enforcement after vampires wasn’t the greatest idea, but there aren’t any puncture wounds and Dad doesn’t seem to be under thrall. Pretty sure people under thrall would bring their son’s breakfast if they asked nicely. Just to be sure its best to stock up on garlic, or well… I don’t think its possible to find a virgin stallion either. Which is probably only helpful if vampires have graves, which they don’t seem to. Not when sunlight isn’t an issue._

“You’re joking.” 

“Nope, it's all on the level. I checked.”

“You just believe the story they're telling you. They probably do this all the time. Next thing you know, you’ll be a vampire too and then where will I be!” Stiles’s leg was itching, so he was armed with a knitting needle, which went flying across the room when he gestured wildly.

“Vampires? ….Son you need to get out a little more. This is crazy. His sister does stunts for a living and she’s fine. They were just practicing. She showed me the pads and everything,” his dad walked out after that, mumbling something about 18-year-old sons being old enough to leave home.

Sliding over the room in his computer chair, Stiles picked up the knitting needle and checked out the street through the window. No movement at all in number 114. No movement anywhere actually. There weren't even any cats. Did vampires eat cats?

~*~

_**Day Fifteen** In a 16th-century burial near Venice, a brick forced into the mouth of a female corpse has been interpreted as a vampire-slaying ritual by the archaeologists who discovered it in 2006._

“Are you working on your college stuff already?” 

Stiles hadn’t heard Scott come in at all, so he jumped a little and whacked his hand against his desk. Shooting a murderous look Scott’s way, he closed the lid on his laptop and leaned back to stretch. 

“College hasn’t even started yet; there isn’t anything I can do anyway. I’m just… researching vampires... for no reason at all.” 

“Oh, well do you need my help?”

“Nah, bro, thanks. Maybe we can go out today though, I’m tired of sitting up here in this stupid room all the time,” Stiles hadn't even realised it was 11am. Hopefully he could get lunch while he was out. “Just let me change and then we can head down the stairs”. 

Before he could start pulling clean clothes from his drawers, the doorbell rang. Stiles just looked at Scott, who bless his soul turned and said he’d go answer it. 

Scott hadn't returned by the time Stiles finished changing, so Stiles figured it was down the stairs on his own this time. He lumbered awkwardly down the stairs, then he stopped at the bottom, astonished to discover that Scott had progressed from answering the door to letting strangers into the house. Stiles' house. Stiles' kitchen. A pretty girl in a leather jacket was leaning on the counter in front of a plate of cookies, talking to Scott. 

“Stiles?” 

“Uh… yes? Hi, girl I don’t know?” 

He looked to Scott for help, but Scott was in the middle of cramming two cookies into his mouth at the same time, making him useless for introductions. Or explanations. Stiles would have settled for an explanation.

The girl laughed a little and walked over to shake his hand. 

“I’m Laura, Derek’s sister. Derek is your neighbour in 114?” She smiled at him as she introduced herself, baring perfect teeth. No fangs at all. 

“Ah, of course. Was there something I could help you with?” It's not even like Derek has visited or introduced himself before. 

“Oh, I just wanted to apologise for the other night. We must have given you a bit of a scare with the stunts, but I promise you it was very safe. Plus I bought cookies,” her ponytail was long and whipped over her shoulder as she turned to grab the plate from Scott. 

“Oh well, just trying to keep the neighbourhood safe and all that,” Stiles was not going to be lured with chocolate chip cookies. They were probably drugged or something. Unfortunately his telepathic messages to Scott to not eat them don’t seem to be working at all. 

Laura just smiled at him. “I should get my brother to come over here sometime. I’m heading back to L.A tomorrow for a week, but maybe when I get back we could get together for a bite?” While she’s looking at Stiles in a way that seems hopeful, her murderous words aren’t any less threatening. No way was he going anywhere for a _bite_ with the Hales. 

“Ah you know, I’m really pretty busy at the moment with you know... stuff.” 

“Bro, you literally have been sitting in your room for over two months,” Scott chimed in. Stiles gave him a glare that hopefully conveyed how dead to him Scott was. Laura just seemed even more amused. 

“Ok, well, we’ll see when I get back. Gotta run anyway. See you around, boys. Enjoy the cookies,” Laura headed for the door and let herself out.

“Dude, what was that?” Stiles hissed.

“What? Come on, they're just people, Stiles. People who brought cookies! Being trapped in your room is making you crazy,” Scott ate another cookie. 

 

~*~

_**Day Sixteen** Ok, so I’m closing up shop on this investigation, and not just because those cookies were delicious and didn’t have any side-effects whatsoever. I mean, they're probably not vampires. They do come out during the day. I have better things to do that sit around watching the neighbours anyway._

“So I got an interesting call today.” Any sentence that starts with that does not put Stiles at ease at all. It's the Sheriff’s go-to phrase for something bad. Usually involving Stiles. Okay, always involving Stiles. 

“Yeah?" Stiles just continued eating his dinner, and waited. 

“Mrs. Hirsch called. Said something about someone watching her from their window?” The Sheriff calmly set his fork down and looked pointedly at Stiles. 

“That’s really interesting, Dad,” Stiles did not meet his eyes; just kept eating. His father sighed. 

“Just stop staring at the neighbours, Stiles. It's creepy.”

~*~

_**Day Nineteen** We are absolutely back on track, someone just moved a body at 114. It's night time, so I’m not 100% sure who, but there is definitely some carrying into car trunks. Something big. Body-big._

This time he didn’t call his dad. He just took furtive glances out the window every now and then to try and figure out what was going on. It could be just a bag of potatoes or something, right? He hadn't even been staring out the window! It was purely coincidental that he happened to get up to pull the curtains just as someone was dumping a suspiciously body-shaped package into the trunk of a car. 

Stiles wasn’t even sure if was Derek this time. There could be any number of people in this freaky vampire cult. The body type seems a bit different and it's not Derek’s car. Who even moved things at 11 o’clock at night anyway? Murderers, that's for sure. Calling his dad would just make things worse. 

~*~

_**Day Twenty** Today is the day for hands-on research! Just saw Derek drive off to volunteering at the shelter or whatever, so there will be some serious checking for gravesites in the backyard. _

Waking up in the dark was disconcerting. Stiles was officially disconcerted. The worst part was that his hands were handcuffed behind his back. He was sitting in a chair, in a basement and his broken leg was propped up on the chair in front of him, with a cushion under it. So this was probably the oddest kidnapping situation Stiles had ever been in. Actually, this was the only kidnapping situation that Stiles had ever been in. But the cushion was a nice touch. He's probably not going to be killed, then. At least not right away.

“You’ve been spying on Derek,” the voice came out of nowhere. Stiles was pretty sure he had been alone, but a man came out of the shadows, and wow that was cliché. Stiles looked back at him, saying nothing. He knew the deal, talkers just get killed faster. Creepy McCreeperson just rolled his eyes at him and walked closer. “I’m not going to kill you. Just tell me why you're spying on Derek.”

“Nope, not spying. I’m just a curious guy and happen to sometimes see him out of my window. It's not spying, it's just where my eyes go sometimes. Can’t be helped. Who is this Derek anyway? I don’t know a Derek.” The room was mostly devoid of light, the windows blacked out, and it was creepy. There was no other furniture lying around at all.

“Perhaps you could tell me what you’ve learned?” Psycho McCrazypants leaned forward and for just for a second, Stiles could swear his eyes glowed a little. 

“What do you mean? I just said I don’t know anything at all,” Stiles knew how to get out of handcuffs, but he hadn’t really practiced doing it while his hands were behind his back and oh yeah his leg was broken and stretched out in front of him, on a cushion. What self-respecting kidnapper makes sure the kidnappee was comfortable anyway?

“Now, now, we both know that isn’t true, is it Stiles?” This guy was definitely used to getting his way and sweet-talking people. The Seductive tone make Stiles’s skin crawl. So creepy.

“How do you even know my name?” 

“Oh, I’m a man of many talents, Stiles. Much like yourself. Curiosity about my surroundings is something we have in common.” 

“You’re one too, aren’t you?” 

“Now might be my time to plead the fifth in that regard.”

“I know what you are.” 

“You have no idea.”

“Yeah, I do. And I have copious notes, which my father, the sheriff of this town I might add, will find and then he’ll find you - ok well he’ll probably go after Derek first but still. Maybe they’ll both find me."

“You have no idea what you're talking about, Stiles,” he paused, looking at Stiles like he wanted to eat him. “You know that no one will believe you.”

“They will. I’ll make sure they will,” Stiles rattled the handcuffs behind him. He was too young to be a creature of the night. His head hurt too. This was not his best detective work.

“Then what am I?” 

“A vampire”.

Two things happen then. First, Psycho McCrazypants bursts out laughing, Second, Derek plowed through the door, face kinda murderous. _Now_ Stiles was going to die. 

“ _Peter!_ ” Nope, Derek was focused on Creepy McCreeperson. That was a good start. “What are you doing?”

“Oh, Derek, I was just having a little chat with your neighbour here. You’ve met Stiles, right? Enterprising lad who sees too much?” Peter seemed amused by the fact that he sounded like a mob boss in the making.

“I haven’t had the pleasure yet, actually,” Derek muttered, but headed toward Stiles on the chair anyway. 

“Nope, too young to die. You stay away from me, buddy,” Stiles struggled harder to get rid of the cuffs on his hands, but mostly just succeeded in hurting his shoulders. Derek backed up a little with his hands up. 

“Would if it help if I told you I’m definitely not a vampire?” He smirked, just a little and well, Stiles thought that was just kinda rude, really. It would be nice if he took this situation seriously. 

“What makes you think I’m going to believe you? Why else would I be trapped in your stupid basement?” Stiles glared at them both, raising his eyebrows and rattling the cuffs behind him. 

“Umm, because I go out in the daytime, Stiles. I know you’ve seen me, you watched me wash my car. Plus this is California, so you can’t argue that Twilight crap on me.” 

If Stiles could see himself in a mirror, he'd know his cheeks could rival a fire engine for their redness. 

“First of all, that you’ve read Twilight is hilarious. Second, that still doesn’t explain the basement kidnapping. Seriously, what time is it? My dad will be looking for his injured son.” 

“You’ve actually only been down here for about an hour, maybe an hour and a half. It's only four,” Peter piped up. “Also, you knocked yourself out trying to climb into the window, so technically you’re the one who has broken the law so far. I just rearranged you to a more comfortable position.” 

“Oh. Well… handcuffs?” Stiles offered back, but he deflated a little. Maybe breaking and entering with a cast wasn’t the best plan he’s ever had. 

Derek stepped forward and broke the handcuffs with his bare hands, which was crazy because Stiles has been pulling on them for ages. Must have weakened them for him. 

“Let's just get you out of here. Don’t worry about Peter; he’s… paranoid, and doesn't have any manners whatsoever,” Derek said as he pulled Stiles up from his chair and started to lead him out from the basement, which was not an easy feat with his heavy cast. 

“I’m pretty sure that one of you dragged a body out of here last night,” Stiles blurted out, because clearly he didn't understand a dangerous situation when he came across one. Derek turned to him as he helped him up the stairs, looking bewildered.

“Peter was moving carpet. I can show you where we tore it up if you like,” Derek says. “How about I help you over to your house, we don’t tell your dad about the breaking and entering, we call this even, and you consider the idea that we aren’t crazy murderers?” 

Stiles just looked at him and then motioned his head toward Peter. 

Derek rolled his eyes. “Fine, consider the idea that we’re not murderers at least.” 

That was probably a fair trade.

~*~

_**Day Twenty-Five** Its car washing day and i’m going to miss it because i’ll be at the hospital. At least the cast is coming off. Pretty sure i’m onto something with Mrs Hirsch, too, because there is this fae called a Cait Sidhe, and frankly that many cats is just weird. I know there is supernatural behaviour in this neighbourhood and i’m going to find out what it is. _

It was slow going as he got out of the jeep. He hadn’t been driving, Scott had taken the jeep in order to get him to the hospital and back, and while the cast was gone, his leg was pretty sore and he was supposed to be taking it easy, so crutches. 

“Stiles!”

Stiles turns and sees Derek jogging over from his yard, and well... that’s a sight he’s not going to forget anytime soon. Even if he’s glaring a little. Like he’s not happy to be talking to him. 

“Hey Derek,” Stiles grimaces. He hadn’t talked to him since Derek had safely returned him to his house almost a week ago. He’d been pointedly not looking out his window, except to check a few times this morning, since it was car washing day. Lets face it, he’s only human and Derek’s car washing schedule is definitely something that was confirmed by research.

“I ah, I wanted to let you know that Peter has gone home. He won’t be back... for a while. Laura told me to tell you. Just... well you know.” Derek seemed a little nervous, which is weird since it wasn’t him that broke into someone’s house. Allegedly broke in mind you. 

“You know, I’m just going to head home, let me know if you need anything, Stiles. Bye Derek,” Scott interrupted and then headed over to his own bike to take off. It must be date night. 

“Ah thanks for that, but its totally fine you can have whomever you want in your house, moving dead bodies.” Stiles did feel a little better knowing Peter was gone though.

“It wasn’t a dead body!” Derek is exasperated, something Stiles is used to really, and then seems to get a hold of himself. “It was carpet, he was... you know never mind it doesn’t matter. Seriously, you can come have a look anytime.” 

“Well I might just do that. Randomly. Out of the Blue so you don’t know its coming.” Stiles is not sure that any of the Hale’s should be trusted.

Derek just smiles at him a little, despite the murder accusations he seems to loosen up a little. “How about you come for dinner tonight instead?” 

“Dinner?” Stiles just looks at him. 

“Yeah, you, me, Dinner.” Is Derek blushing a little? 

“Umm, well… yeah. Yeah that’d be good. With Laura?” Stiles asks. 

“No, not with Laura. Just us. I made something, but if you want to go out… we could go out?” Derek rubs the back of his neck and pointedly doesn’t look at Stiles.

Its a good thing that Stiles has his crutches to hold him up, because frankly this is unexpected. “Like... a date?” 

“Yeah.” Derek really smiles then, bright and wide and yeah. Stiles thinks he could handle seeing that again. Maybe forever.

“You’re asking the guy that spied on you and broke into your house over for dinner? On a Date?” 

“Well… you’re not boring. I’m sure you’ll make great conversation?” Derek phrases it like a compliment but it sounds like a question in the end. 

“I’ll have you know that i’m a veritable font of knowledge actually on all sorts of subjects. Most recently vampires.”

Derek just rolls his eyes again. “Also I haven’t washed the car yet, So if you wanna watch from a little closer than your window, you can come over now.” 

Derek smirks at him as Stiles chokes a little at that. 

~*~

Months later, Stiles is home for his mid year break, and sitting at the counter in Derek’s Kitchen. It's freezing cold outside and the rain is rapping out a beat as it pelts against the windows. Derek actually had been remodeling the house over the summer and it looked really nice. They were both in their pajama pants even though it was midday because when it's that cold out, no one cares about proper dress. Derek turns to Stiles, in the middle of making pancakes and just looks at him for a beat. 

“Just so you know, I’m a werewolf,” Derek was smiling a little, his eyes glowing blue.

When Derek’s teeth elongate, Stiles squawks and falls off his stool.


End file.
